How Long
Meagan, you suck.
I had a private lesson with the low brass professor today.
Do I really miss music?
ugh.
Science is going well.
I'm doing well.
I'll do well.
But I feel nothing.
No sense of enjoyment or direction.
Did I hate music school?
Or was I scared because, for once in my life, I wasn't outstanding?
I've prayed for purpose for three years.
I've asked for guidance so many times.
Why will He not tell me?
Or why am I not listening?
posted by Meagan at 7:53 PM
2 Comments:
you'll figure it out. just give it time. :)
9:17 PM
He's not purposely ignoring you. I've felt the same way since school started, you know that. I think music will always be a part of your life, whether you study it or not. Science isn't particularly something that people just do for fun. It needs to be studied to do anything with it. I completely understand how you felt at the music school. I still feel that way. It's hard not being the best and comparing yourself to other people who have done some serious work over the last couple years, and probably a lot more in high school too. Maybe you'll find that after a semester or two, you're hating science. But it seems to happen to so many people. If you do decide to change, you'll already be headed in some sort of direction. You might not continue with science, but you know how to go about doing things now. It won't be so hard next time, and you'll feel more comfortable starting something else then. You told me I was here for a reason, and I know you feel the same way. I'm not feeling a sense of enjoyment at the music school either. Not yet, anyways. I'm praying for patience to get through all this first-time stuff, and I've got faith that it will get so much better. That goes for you, too. :o) I looooove you and I am so glad that we're here together- I couldn't have asked for a better housemate/friend/mentor to be here with me. Things will work themselves out, I knows it b'y!
p.s longest comment everrrrrrrrr.
10:24 AM
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