Happy Thoughts

This has been a very, very, very weird day.
All morning and afternoon, I felt like C-R-A-P crappy crap.
And I'm pretty sure I acted like it too.
My nose is on permanent outflux.
But we'll leave that in the hands of Equate Extra Strength Night Time Cold Medication.
And God.
So, as I was saying.
I sulked all through the morning and lunch.
Because of how overwhelmingly behind I am in chemistry.
And because of the nose situation that I previously discussed.
But my chemistry lab actually went pretty well.
My instructor was very helpful.
And she actually seemed to care that I'm working my butt off to try to catch up.
And while I was stirring my CaCO3 I had a eureka moment.
And I realized . . .
What's the big deal?
So what if I don't make the freaking 80% average for the Millennium.
I can pay it back without dying.
Have I mentioned lately how blessed I am
with family and friends in abundance?
Here,
I hugged Josh six times yesterday.
And Robyn is like my new attachedatthehip motivator
Who keeps me sane and not too homesick.
Sarah knows how much I love her.
And Holly and David are too cool for words.
Random friend Lisomething at JCS was a little sketchy.
But I'm sure that's just because I don't know her.
Sorry, Lisomething.
Hopefully, I 'll get to know you soon.
And every time I pass Ali in the UC, I think of home.
And our little innocent circle.
The Good Kids.
The Invisibles.
Borborygmous.
Or whatever we're calling ourselves these days.
When I think of my best friend
I realize that I've only seen her cry three times:
Once when some idiot squat her finger in her locker.
Once in her dad's arms at the graduation dance.
And Once as she left me in St. John's.
And somewhere in my sick and twisted mind that makes me happy.
And I want to cry too.
And then I wonder why things have to change.
My parents are coming to St. John's this weekend.
As much as I don't want to admit it, I'm ecstatic.
They've always been good at calming me down when I'm stressed.
And I'm going home in two weeks.
With a car full of loonies.
haha.
I can't wait to hug Heather and Erika and Sarah and Samantha and Ashley and Tiffany and Grammy.
And never let them go.
But at the same time, I don't think I want to be back there right now.
As much as I miss everyone at home, (brace for cliche) we'll always be together.
Has anyone noticed that I can take all of the courses I'm doing now in Corner Brook.
Yah, shock and awe.
But I don't have that stabbing anxious feeling in my chest
that accompanies me whenever I know I've made a wrong decision.
Because I feel like I'm here for a reason.
And, at the end of the day,
I'm loving every minute of it.