Have I Ceased from Walking Close Beside Thee

Have you ever felt like an entire service was created just for you?
That's how I feel right now.

I've made a big life change about church. I don't always feel welcomed. I feel like so many people are there for the wrong reasons. I feel like no one would even notice if my friends and I left. And, in this, I know I'm definitely not alone.

But this rut I've spent the last few months in is only hurting myself. Yep, a lot of peoples' intentions are messed up. And I'm not always going to feel joyous at church. But, if I look, there are so many amazing people there who already love me and who, I'm sure, would be devastated if they knew how we felt.

So if they want me, fine. If they don't want me, that's ok. Going to church isn't about me.

Have I ceased from walking close beside Thee?

Have I grieved Thee with an ill kept vow?

In my heart of hearts, have I denied Thee?

Speak, dear Lord, O speak and tell me now.